“An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind.” – Buddha
Do you hang onto friends who suck out your energy or make you feel miserable about yourself? Parenthood has a way of bringing these fuzzy relationships into startlingly clear focus. I’m of the opinion that when we have kids, we feel less inclined to put forth energy toward relationships that drain us. We also feel less apologetic about ending those friendships. When you’re starved for adult social interaction anyway, the last person you want to hang out with when you aren’t with your family is someone who consistently brings you down or drains your energy away.
I just finished reading Rosalind Wiseman’s book Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads. The book has loads of great information for parents who are in the midst of navigating conflicts with other parents. One of the issues Wiseman brought up was the concept of a “Friendship Bill of Rights.”
I would assume most everyone has had friendships that have turned sour for various reasons, but if you seem to consistently attract friends who aren’t very good friends, you should consider drawing up a bill of rights for yourself and reflect on whether or not you can give back what you desire in a friendship. (Remember that golden rule thingy?)
What do you most value in a friend? List your top three requirements:
For example:
1) Has empathy and compassion for others
2) Has a great sense of humor
3) Usually follows through with what she says she’s going to do
Now, consider if you can give those same values back to your friends.
What traits do you most value in your friends?
